Lets talk about Triggers that happened to me today…

Lets reframe with my vulgar language this will happen from time to time as I understand, grow and learn how to use better language in expressing my Disgust about how Triggers, effect me when they hit.. (so please excuse me I really do not mean to be so rude…ok, perhaps I do, but, you know what I mean)

I will be sharing my experiences of my own triggers how to understand them, realise you are not alone in this strange way of trying to understand yourself

We are human and trauma on top of being us makes us feel like a elephant that decided to sit on our heads because he/she wanted too… RIghtO Heffa!

Well, I am going to share with you mine.. please, please know that I only do this because I want to help you .. and if we do not share our feelings of crap, whatever you wish to express your mental bullshit illness that is.. then you express it..

I give you permission…… yeah, right.. me give you.. oh never mind… read it please you nut bags…

Lovely people.. this may take some times….heheheh joking

Trauma Therapy


Firstly lets talk about how I am triggered.. and how this could help you see familular characteristics like me (god help you) with how to recognise them.

This is my trigger this week that ended up today… more so…

  • tired
  • run down
  • didnt take my menopause tablets
  • didnt complete my assignments for study (result I punish myself)
  • Felt ugly
  • Disgusting
  • House was unclean

The above are only just a few that affect most of us, sometimes if we really are low, and close to triggering.. or I will call it “one more shove over the cliff, I am ready about now”.

Without us even realising it we are already there with uncertainty about how we feel about ourselves.

For me it was not enough I felt those above I had to punish myself further by:

  • Feeling unworthy
  • Unloved and not worth anyones time of day
  • Why is he with me?
  • Why do I feel after 20 years that he loves me (what was I thinking … if true you will die a painful death i not … love you)

I will dictate that better later… in other words when you love something or someone so much and it’s pulled away by making you feel unworthy it is like a sword that has driven deeply into your heart and without you even being aware every time someone hurts a person when they would never hurt anyone it damn well rips your guts out and makes you feel less than human…. that is what my feel was when I lost my son to bitter, angry, unwarranted and bastard like bullshit …

Golden rule parents…. Never use your children as a tool against each other, because trauma also occurs when we love our parents!

As we all know and if we don’t then we should understand this – Children blame themselves and parents blame each other.. why because we a selfish individuals when we fight over money and things.. (remember that)

When your body is telling you something stop and go over it and over it until you hear something simular and that could be a single sentence that is repeated but your brain still has a hard time in registering it… it’s like a slow boat or perhaps better said, when everything slows down so much that you feel like your a record being held against playing a beautiful song…

  1. Remember boys and girls when you are run down, tired, not feeling well, in my case lack of energy, sore lower back made me feel yuk right, then I slowly start to have the energy to understand “hang on.. why am I feeling this way and suddenly I have this boost of energy again… however, as I am run down I don’t retain this thought.. and back to lack of energy…

To understand you.. and how this works you must understand and allow yourself to be brave and put yourself out there.. I guess.. I must, must be very, very Clear when I say this… Mental Illness isn’t your fault…. ok…..

I will say it again….



ALL TOGETHER NOW, MENTAL ILLNESS IS NOT MY FAULT…. GOT IT… FAR OUT GOOD..ssheeeeeeeeeeeeeesh how hard… oh never mind.. moving on..


So, please read the above only those who get it will understand it… and those who understand it will eventually get it…

A quote by me……. When you share your fears, loves, happiness after trauma, be sure those we share these beautiful things is a compliments because we care and love you all.. so never ever take that for granted… that is a Pure beautiful gift we give but, only to those that get us…

And for those who I now understand…… I will going forward do my utmost best to work it out myself without putting too much on those that care deeply and because those chosen few (lucky those few) I thank you with all my heart.. and understand if you hesitate in picking up that phone.. bastards….. I get it… thank you xxx


download (2)

To get here you should applaud yourself, it is very brave, of you to care about you.. and that is okay to do this….. never ever ladies and gents think you are alone..

I am swimming sometimes and drowning the next but, it does get better with understanding, and giving yourself a bloody pat on the back for being YOU……

Thank you and if you wish to comment, abuse , agree, disagree, and even share your experiences I will adore you because you may end up helping ME too..



Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

Stories From Tanya

Stories from 11 years as an expat in Asia, language learning, and the transition back to my "home" country...

The Quintessential Clothes Pen

an exploration of historical costume

PADI Pros South East Asia



Christ Follower, Wife, Mother, Grammy, Prayer Director/Strategist International Orality Network http://Orality.net Passionate about the Kingdom & Rev. 5:9 & 7:9

A Restless Sleep Eternal

For in that sleep of undeath what dreams may come?

Pretty in Punch!

A recipe in the making...

The Kink Journals

Sex and kink tips tricks and general advice

Rachel Dalgarno

Holistic Living / Natural Beauty / Spiritual Nourishment

Roth Poetry

Poetry From the Heart!

Becoming a Warrior Queen

Patty's Path to Healing from Childhood Abuse

David Palethorpe

The thoughts, dreams and ideas of an insignificant speck of humanity in the Universe 😀

Ten Thousand Days

The long and winding journey after loss

The Journey to Me

exploring the pathways returning to me


conversations with Sean Paul Mahoney

- Fighting the Good Fight -

Writer and Mental Health Blogger

Something Different

I am a blogger and youtuber from Derby. I write about Mental Health to Beauty to Organisation

%d bloggers like this: