The highest respect you can give a man is to be a MAN…it is his birth right!

My understand and likes, dislikes, as a Rebellious Submissive

The most common practice when engaging in BDSM is the delegation of roles: submissive and dominant it is the highest level of respect by both of these kinky people in the BDSM family.

And I think that is awesome personally!

To be either one the respect, honor of both roles should always be held with the Highest Respect because as these two role are so different but very much compliment each other both have to follow a very disciplined behaviour

If you recall our history books way back.. Cave man times,  if he wanted a women he would take the women.. I do believe reading that the Cave man would hold up his wooden hand-made mallot and give her a good wallop her over the head then grab her long mane and drag her by the hair in that Manly walk back to his cave, (Ugh) then he would say, in a funny tone, “My name is Tarzan, and she is my Jane”.

Sounds a little aggressive it seems that both have distinct roles

  • A. One is a male because of his strength and bravery and
  • B. Is the female I will paint her maintained by the Salon Cave woman spa’s of that time. (in other words she was the prettiest one of the ugly, hair full of nits or without nits kinda girl)

So, For a submissive (I can speak for this as I am a bit of a rebel sub) they say a Rebellious Submissive leaves some dominants with a bit of a bad taste in their mouths mainly because she is a lot of work.  No! Really, gosh!

However, then you have that strong type of bloke, that one who has the Ego as big as a sky scraper, that likes a bit of spirit in his veins and would find her very attractive, a challenge, perhaps yes, a Jane to his Tarzan.

I guess it is all about tastes, likes and most of all respect and maturity (or just a dirty Dom that wants to play with nieve sweet rebellious subs) to be either a Dominant or a Submissive you really have to be wired like that.. or perhaps rather randy, kinky, highly sexed or a bit on the dirty side of things.

My thoughts on these two roles are this..

My expectations (Ha, notice my expectations, if only) from my Dominant that he holds himself with honor, respects himself and of course (can keep up with his mischievious sub that loves to torment his ASS, make him swet, and believe me she will and always will be a handful of naughty..

This combination of Dom and side of naughty is a definant ticker of the box for “Us right, boys”

You, me and US


For my readers we have been together for over 20 years, let’s be honest if I had to personalise both of us as human beings we would be lovely, engaging, a good looking couple, trouble, sassy, classy, and very bad assy if you really want to know us we would probably do your head in within a day okay make that a few minutes.

Seriously, though we both are nice people just looking to up our Sexy time together, I mean I, him and us, could last as long as I dunno one of us spits the dummy and says, oh go to hell, been there done that!

As we both get older and times change a couple must adapt in change and feed off each like wild animals.. a bit like Tarzan and the apes……or that cave man that likes to creep in at night and sneek up when you don’t notice him…  sneaky little shit … oh, sorry I mean devil… hehehe

Yes, of course you have couples in this kind of kinky situation with so called rules, his rules and they seem to vary with each time we waste a night chatting about what we are going to do and not do?   Does that make sense?

Nothing is ever easy I must say and it is always surprising, well, it would only be surprising if we actually complish something without me and my stupid bitch wanda my subconcious twit bitch that seems to go to the closet and fetchs her stupid cape to save the day… yet again, and again, and again…

Our minds are simply amazing I must admit and the more we grow and understand how to re-wire our brains that have seemed to be warped by the bad decsions in both of our lives however, it seems I am the flavour of the month cuz Wanda, you know Wanda that subconcious of mine..  Sorry, I got a bit side tracked, yes, our minds, that part or section that is the better side of the mind that loves to connect with morons sorry I mean’t like minded partners, friends and most of all pain in the asses.. However, yes, a couple if they wish to dive into the deep (heaven forbid you would be brave enough, talk the talk normally follows with do the do)

Old saying, “Why am I surrounded by fools”

And not to mention my amazing level of patience which I have to say is excellent and very kind to those who we have lucky enough to be in our presences (if you can see him cuz hes normally with Wanda my stupid subconcious, I am sure that they are both having a mind affair I just wish they both would get out of my mind..

It was noisy.. however, now is calm like the sea on a day before a Tidal Wave is about to land and kill all the Islanders…


Submission actually helped me let go of my sexual fustration that is and seems to be still their cuz some smart ass is playing let’s play silly buggers with Candii, she has no idea this is real or unreal or sireal, or forget what I am trying to say it was a nice surprise considering I am such a controlling women who never saw her pig headed side until meeting the soul mate of all time my husband who I adore and cannot wait for session 51 the life and times of  “Masters of the Universe staring Birdy and Filthy




Not to mention Rebellious Submissive the Crazy Chick that loves this kind of stuff, why? well, she will get back to you when they end up telling her that she is nuts with a cherry on the top!

Anyway, my humour is a tad sassy and spunky, funny and loopy but most of all no that will do for now.. I may change this a little later!


So, do you both ever have difficulty

Difficulties, are you kidding, HELL, YES, we have blockages, we never plan, we always seem to talk too much, spend alot of money on crap to get us horny and then we procrastinate to the friggin hilt and back, and we repeat it again and again!!


Moving forward to my present day

So, what is it about being a submissive that shocked you!!

I never in my entire life thought I would fall into a role with such excitment actually that isnt the truth it was pure luck by conversation of what we liked before we had sex.

I was basically at my cross roads of life and so was he and we both had enough of shitty relationships, marriages, failed sexual arousals and thought this is how I want things in my life, I am a single mum, if you cannot handle that then you are best to go..

His manner was basically, ego lead, rude, and a bit arrogant which didnt sit really well with me so I left and said fine, good bye, however, I had no idea that was a something of his interest as he heard or felt something within his pitter patter of his body or I dunno.

Perhaps we fitted very well, and had very strong chemisty and we never in the beginning failed at that area of our relationship it seemed to grow into those Roles and we both suited those roles very well indeed.

Everything in life seems to either work or not, however, never think that when you perhaps do things a little risky and you possibly had past events that lead to trauma before meeting your lovely like minded man it did get a little rocky at the start!!

A trauma to some people can last a life time for me I did have a mechanism in me to shelf it and deal with that later kind of attitude.. which probably wasnt good in this case cuz it did confuse us all..

Next time probably best to ask if okay, but, even so, if I didnt have a incident those weeks prior I would have continued doing what I love to do and that is whatever!!

I was a little like that and I loved my spirit of being free to express and feel whatever I wanted to but, when things bog you down and you dont get some kind of help a kind ear or a shoulder your stupid SUbconcious Wanda will bite you in the butt..





You read a lot of kinks under the BDSM title Dom’s having slaves, subs, littles, etc, then taking in other alpha males to be their whatever, it is all about levels of kink in each person, couple, etc..  I have read alot about these two roles and we often see threesome, couples being liberated to have many different quirky kinks and I get that.  We all have our special needs I guess and I will find this out as I study sex therapy next year, I keep saying to myself experiences are growth, understanding is growth.. Oh, dear god!

I thought about my husband as my Dom having another male in a threesome we tend to discuss a lot of sexual ideas, fantasies, wishful hopeful kinks (greedy he is!) Anyway, I thought well, that would be very difficult as it would not be that easy for me to submit to another male, in fact I had no idea how that looked to be perfectly honest!

I used to say I would love to be in between Brad Pitt and George Cluney, however, even those two very good-looking, hot, rich, and yes, you know the rest, they still would have to suit my incredibly harsh and judgie needs of perfection (if that is even a word that exists)

Actually, no I would submit happily and do it again and again and again…. so lets be real we in that kind of mind set .. will always be wired just the way we are.. and that is okay..

Okay xxx



The likeness of this occurring is Santa landing on Mars!!

Here is some logic from

And below from those professionals… not me…….. as you can see no humour

Currently, male domination and female submission is the most common practice, but not by very much. There is an increasing presence of male submission and female domination that has psychologists attempting to explain why social roles have been discarded, and also rationalizes why some people choose to keep and re-enact social roles in the bedroom (in feminine-submissive/male-dominated relationships).

First, it is important to note that BDSM, while integrated into one’s sex life, is not actually about the sex. Having dominant and submissive roles allows people to breach the margins of their social roles. For example, type-A personalities and Alpha males may actually experience psychological relief by handing their power and social dominance over to someone else, says Matthew Hutson of Psychology Today. In fact, those who may not be in socially powerful positions may enjoy taking control in the bedroom instead. Quite typically in these cases, the roles played in the bedroom are not reflective of the lives of the participants outside of the boudoir.

A current cause for controversy surrounding BDSM is its supposed ‘infliction’ on the feminist movement. Upon discussing this matter with females aged 18-32, many women find that surrendering in the bedroom means succumbing to oppressive societal roles placed on women. Again, this goes back to the idea of Alpha personalities wanting to give up control. In fact, many submissive women are in positions of power or authority in their social lives and are more than willing to allow their partner to take over that sense of control. It is also important to note that when regarding women as submissive, subs (especially women) often have more control than the one dominating them. There are always limitations, and very often there is a safety word, which allows for the obedient to control what the dominant person is doing.

Dr. Leon Seltzer of Psychology Today states that female submission is often centered around the inherent want to be “irresistible,” or desiring a man to be unable to control himself in the sexual pursuit of the woman. Upon examining this theory and sharing it with the females I had previously talked to, the majority now find female submission to be a form of empowerment (as long as there are limitations).

Researchers Ogas and Gaddam suggest that both submission and dominance can trigger psychological pleasure. People are biologically and socially programmed to act a certain way (females submissive, males dominant), and both acting out those roles in extreme, and completely reversing them will provide pleasure in certain circuits of the brain.

This research suggests that taking on either or both dominant and submissive functions, either simultaneously or not, can prove to be an outlet for pleasure in both men and women. If being tied up or dominated is what you’re into, or you really want to know what it is like to take charge in the bedroom, talk to your partner about the guarantee of pleasure and try it out!

So ladies, remember this when you are in a relationship with a man   

The highest respect you can give a man is to be a MAN…it is his birth right!

Plus, us ladies, were not born with male balls now where we.. so allow those to have that pride and love them for being who they should be you might be surprised or delighted it all depends on your choices.



Categories: Owner of The Candii Club
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