Growth and having a little bit of fun with a splash of realisation is the best experience and also understanding about who you are as a person especially when you tell a story and even you have a few areas of your story you say, this is how I see it but, I do not know how to explain in simply.
I am a very happy, loving outgoing girl who had a few areas in my upbringing that should have hindered me but, because I came from such a strong dominating family Irish/Italian background I guess I had to brush of the bullshit and get on with the real shit of life.
And that is how I lived my life you see we have a choice are you a victim of what someone does to you or do you take it back and say, sorry try bloody harder because you didn’t kill my wild and free spirit.
The only way a person can do this to you is if you allow them to take it off you .. okay, yes some people can and some people can’t and to be honest don’t think for one moment that I didn’t think of not brushing off someones shit that contaminated a bit of my inner spirit and to be honest those many weeks of sadness and I did have them I knew deep down that I was worth more than some shit head that decided to do something without asking.
So, my point to this post is… always remember we are only human and we can do what we can do however, please set yourself a goal and say, okay enough wallowing, enough of the I don’t think I am worthy, enough of the self-pity and say, Fran, this person isn’t worth my life time of regret.
The results will come later trust me… we are a product of our environment and never ever be disempowered by another because frankly your body and your mind is your’s and it will never be theirs..
Many years past and many times I did have events in my life that most people would go is she insane.. however my strength and my resilience was very silent, it was very private and I never allowed it to destroy myself I did notice my choices changed and this is okay they change because you change this took me a very long time to understand it because of my nature of a bit crazy, zany, a little bit odd, and flippant nature.
I seem to reinvent myself but learning a few lessons.. never take something that is not yours to begin with, always be honest because if you lie it is trying and it deplete you, if they or others don’t get you then they are not for you..
Yes, I felt if I allowed my mind to go there in the pits of misery if I wanted a few times, to be honest hated that feeling of yup, so I did what I knew brushed off that bullshit and said, I am worth more than that feeling which I hated.
That empowered me more it also made me a very determined women who was a single mother busy working full-time and I had to be strong for my son I had to be selfish and very matter of fact..because he was my world and he was my priority in my world.
I wasnt the super mother I never fit that mould, I had no net work it was me and him and a few gay mates that got me and that was okay.. as I got stronger I wanted more had a few areas again that I don’t need to discuss here but, again it made me feel a little low however, before I met my husband I did promise myself one thing..
He better be good in bed… because all those other fuckwits that took without asking wasnt and to my surprise he was.. thank god for that.. and the rest has been history..
Of course being strong, stubborn, open-minded with a bit of a twisted back ground I did dive in the deep end a little and perhaps I liked it…
Well, that is something that you need to experience and work out.. I already understand me and what I like and why I like it…
Go figure.. Live your life with as much love and strength and you too will get to understand that your life is just as important as anyone elses..
Love and hugs Franny xxx