Life does not Come with a Road Map


Remember that your thoughts, feelings, emotions, your personal Trauma, will mean something to you, when and if you allow it too!!!

Life does not come with a Road Map now does it!!

So you have choices or do you?? and if you understand your journey in your own life you will understand that all Roads leads to ROME..

Not just 1 ROAD 🙂

Funny how all things turn out upside down, sideways, in life!

We take so long to work out our story we funnily find out that the story you work out is about who you really are.. let me sort of explain what I am trying to say…

When we live our lives and depending on the road surface, which means how bumpy it is or can be as we go through that journey we start if we are lucky enough to allow ourselves to see this.  We then start to chip away at the scenery of what is in front of you as we walk!

Our eyes start to open up and then what occurs is our vision going forward is clearer, I believe in every station has a story, however, never think that just because your past was a little rocky I guess as we walk it and this all depends of the leverage of how harsh it was to walk in the first place.

Remember that all Roads, Leads to Rome, which means, it’s okay, be a little gentle on yourself, don’t try to be so harsh and negative on how you got there.. look at where you are standing right now!

We tend to be drawn at giving ourselves such a hard time, we focus on stupid, crap, all the time, we never focus on the amazing qualities we bring to ourselves and those that are positive in our lives.

Our Earth and Our learnings are so very NEW we really an amazing miracle of life as human beings, we range in so many different levels of ourselves on this Earth and we never seem to focus on the “positives” and the “qualities” and those beautiful “ideas”, that we verbally converse with each other on a daily level.

We end up looking at levels of knowledge and education, rather than philosophy, which if you really think about it that is where we get our ideas from!

So, think back every idea we have as a human being is an idea that we either let go of or we are driven towards it because it means something to us.. Remember, knowledge is all based on a person’s idea, a persons curiosity, a persons spoken word, a persons stupid prank, a persons emotional desire to tell someone they love them and why, we hold onto those because they mean something that is important to them!

Then what we do when we like this sentence, joke, idea, strategy, we then share it to others that possibly would like it, or we share it and even though they don’t like it more than likely that person within another group will say it in jest but, without them even knowing it the like it!

Do you understand what I am trying to say?

rs_1024x573-171121091729-1024-PINK-CHANNING-TATUM-2-EMD-112117.gif

Everything in this world is based on our choices of “LIKE”, which either ends up on a Dictionary, Encyclapedia, or even GODS, words himself end up in the Bible, because someone said something that another person liked!

That is Knowledge!!!

That is Sexual Preference!!

That is life as simple as – Oh, I think that idea makes sense…

 

So, be kind to yourself and those that you love, words can and will matter!!

I leave you with the knowledgable and talented PINK!!

And my personal favourate “Beautiful Trauma”

 

Lyrics
We were on fire
I slashed your tires
It’s like we burned so bright we burned out
I made you chase me
I wasn’t that friendly
My love, my drug, we’re fucked up, oh
‘Cause I’ve been on the run so long they can’t find me
You waking up to remember I’m pretty
And when the chemicals leave my body
Yeah, they’re gonna find me in a hotel lobby ’cause
mm tough times they keep coming
All night laughing and fucking
Some days like I’m barely breathing
Then after we were high and the love dope died, it was you
The pill I keep taking
The nightmare I’m waking
There’s nothing, no nothing, nothing but you
My perfect rock bottom
My beautiful trauma
My love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my drug, we’re fucked up
You punched a hole in
The wall and I framed it
I wish I could feel things like you
Everyone’s chasing
That holy feeling
And if we don’t stay lit, we’ll blow out
Blow out
‘Cause we’ve been on the run so long they can’t find us
Who’s gonna have to die to remind us
That it feels like we chose this blindly
Now I’m gonna fuck up a hotel lobby ’cause
These tough times they keep coming
Last night I might have messed it up again
Some days like I’m barely breathing
Then after we were high and the love dope died, it was you
The pill I keep taking
The nightmare I’m waking
There’s nothing, no nothing, nothing but you
My perfect rock bottom
My beautiful trauma
My love (my love), my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my love, my drug, oh
My love, my love, my drug, we’re fucked up
Mmm tough times they keep coming
All night laughing and fucking
Some days like I’m barely breathing
Then after we were high and the love dope died, it was you
The pill I keep taking
The nightmare I’m waking
There’s nothing, no nothing, nothing but you
My perfect rock bottom
My beautiful trauma
My love, my love, my drug, oh

If you liked or agreed or disagreed with my comments above I would love to hear from you??

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Featured post

Good Will Hunting.. the Famous Robin Williams.. did this role beautifully!


Like I said, this tells a tail of alot of us and per say some of us, in all if we where subjected to abuse, trauma, etc, and recovered (when I say recovered i say this tongue in cheek) I will also say, with anything in life a CHILD who does survive such hideous, depending on this scale will and no doubt have a distorted outcome on their adult life.

This will vary in each of us and that level of abuse a child is subjected to.. we must understand sometimes, we unaware of our biggest Friend or Foe, the SUBCONSCIOUS MIND, this area of how we adapt is questionable!

Which means depending on what the abuse is.. if it is sexual then who can tell until the are older how they look at life sexually!!

For me well, As that famous commercial that sold alot of chicken.

“I like it like that”, Finger licking good!” ha!

https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/compassion-matters/201805/it-s-not-your-fault-overcoming-trauma#=_

I do agree with the above and here is the link that states it very well.. have a read

There is a famous scene in the film Good Will Hunting where Robin Williams, playing a therapist, compassionately repeats the line “It’s not your fault” to Will, a troubled young man with self-destructive tendencies, who happens to be a genius.

The line is a response to the revelation of abuse Will endured as a child.

At first, Will is dismissive of the statement, but as his therapist steadily repeats “It’s not your fault,” he becomes increasingly agitated.

Finally, he erupts into emotion, tearfully allowing the meaning of the words to sink in. This scene is a powerful signification of what trauma can do to a human being.

It is also a testament to the importance of anyone who has experienced trauma embracing the irrefutable reality that it is not their fault.

The character Will may have been a victim of what’s often referred to as “big T trauma,” which can include serious abuse or a life-threatening event.

However, a person does not have to have experienced an explicitly existential event to experience trauma. “Little t trauma” comprises events that may not sound as dramatic as that of war, devastation, or extreme violence, but that significantly impact individuals by causing them distress, fear, or pain and, therefore, change the way they see themselves, other people, and the world around them.

Too often, people seek excuses to dismiss, bury, or overlook both big and little t trauma. They may tell themselves “it was not that bad,” “others had it worse,” or “remembering won’t do any good anyway.” Or they even say things like, “I deserved it,” “I was a bad/difficult kid,” “or “yes, it was hard at the time, but it made me the strong independent person I am today.”

sneeky peeky – As the Beautiful PINK says it so well, Beautiful Trauma,

They’re resistant to facing what they endured and what it’s done to them.

Whether we try to bury or ignore it or not, the impact of a person’s trauma remains. The American Psychological Association wrote that “traumaticevents challenge an individual’s view of the world as a just, safe and predictable place.”

Back to my thoughts see my link about my own life… https://thecandiiclub.com/2018/05/29/can-you-identify-who-is-more-driven-to-suicide/https://thecandiiclub.com/2018/05/29/can-you-identify-who-is-more-driven-to-suicide/

This shake-up to a person’s very worldview changes the course of their life.

“The effects of unresolved trauma can be devastating,” wrote Dr. Peter Levine, author of Healing Trauma.

Like I said, in my previous link on this page….. https://thecandiiclub.com/2018/05/29/can-you-identify-who-is-more-driven-to-suicide/

“It can affect our habits and outlook on life, leading to addictions and poor decision-making.

It can take a toll on our family life and interpersonal relationships. It can trigger real physical pain, symptoms, and disease. And it can lead to a range of self-destructive behaviors.”

The emotional or physical abuse and the pain people have experienced early in life bends them out of shape in many ways, most of which the person is unaware. The mistreatment of an individual within a family is something my father, psychologist and author Robert Firestone(link is external), has described as a “human rights violation(link is external).” He’s written extensively about the toll interpersonal pain and traumatic childhood conditions can have on a person’s freedom and expression of individuality, including that they lead to the formation of powerful psychological defenses(link is external).

“No child is born bad or sinful; rather, the psychological defenses that children form early in life are appropriate to actual situations that threaten the emerging self,” wrote(link is external) Firestone.

“These defenses attempt to cope with and minimize painful experiences and emotions suffered in one’s developmental years; however, as noted, the defensive adaptation tends to become increasingly dysfunctional.”

People who have experienced trauma may form these defensive adaptations to protect themselves early in life, but these very adaptations can go on to limit them when danger is no longer present.

Young children who’ve experienced trauma tend to internalize much of their pain, blaming themselves for their suffering and struggling with feelings of guilt and shame.

This is especially true of trauma experienced at the hands of parents and trusted family members, as young children often find it too threatening to see the faults of their parents fully.

When a child is born, trusting their parents is a matter of survival, and seeing their parent as neglectful, uncaring, or even abusive can feel like a threat to that survival.

As a result, the child forms defenses to cope with painful circumstances, and they internalize their suffering, seeing it as a reflection of some deficiency in their own personality.

They distort their image of themselves to make sense of their maltreatment and believe themselves deserving of the pain they endure. It never fails to surprise me when children as young as 5-years-old reveal their “critical inner voice(link is external)s,” harsh, self-hating attacks that they think about themselves.

Where did these ideas come from and how do they influence the child’s formation of their self?

My Captain, My Captain

Featured post

What does it mean when your needs are not met?

Communication can come into conflict when needs are unfulfilled we tend to feel like we are on a isolated Island and no-one seems to care or want us around them. Unmet needs can lead to feelings that we consider negative like:

  • anger,
  • confusion,
  • disappointment,
  • frustration,
  • hopelessness,
  • irritation,
  • sadness,
  • loneliness and even embarrassment

And many, many other emotions feelings that we are experience in our lives it is a need that requires to be forfilled within ourselves.

Now don’t get me wron there are alot of people who DONT require that loving feeling that seems to be lacking in some peoples lives and they can exisit fine without this however, really this isnt true we end up with the same result.

  • anger,
  • confusion,
  • disappointment,
  • frustration,
  • hopelessness,
  • irritation,
  • sadness,
  • loneliness and even embarrassment

So, sometimes we look for other area’s of our lives to forfill them which can lead to us sleeping around, finding someone else that will or could possibly forfill them or even we tend to make work our priority instead of those who love us but, find it difficult to express their feelings towards us.

We are only human and we must understand we have human needs which is to be loved, cared about, someone that we can turn to and express our feelings, emotions and yes even have sex with…

Many of us forget that we are not ANIMALS we are actually HUMAN beings that want love, we want someone to care about us and we live for others that just understand us..

People think these feelings above are negitives within a human being it really isnt we are nurturing, beautiful idividuals and we want others to like us especially our other halves or those that we are fond of..

I could talk about this subject all day… which I might actually because even I need to remember this that my needs are important and so are those we love.

Appologies, to those that I love I feel sometimes I am just starting my life again and I am just beginning to understand how to walk… so thank you for opening up my eyes.. and I will try my upmost hardest to remember my NEEDS and YOUR NEEDS.

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