Now let’s talk about the new ad that seems to be causing so much of a ruckus!!!
To be perfectly honest I like this video I am still from that generation that believes in a male does have many rights of him being a man his honour, pride and sense of judgement will only come from his understandings while he grows.
This means if you do not allow a child to go through bullying, up against butt heads, and doffuses, I often wonder what type of male are you bringing into this world?
You would hope that there would be many different levels of shades but, it does go back to a lot of things as I am not a male however, my brother was disabled and if I which I did fight a lot of his fights as a child at home and in the playground there where times I walked away with him screaming at me saying help me, but, I had to because he had to understand what happens to another person if you do fight their battles for them!!
Plus, just so you are all aware I knew the difference who he was up against as well, so he had a fair argument or fight with a few that really all you had to do is blow in their general direction… all I had to do is jump high and bounce on top of them usually with me hanging on their back and yelling “You touch my brother Bradley Denchem, Richard Hawley and you will cop it from me… (like I used to do because I was a rather tiny little tot) he ended up finding out that they where easy to beat… always look out for your family and friends.. just saying 🙂
Usually, I would be thrown off and laughted at however, I was always given a hand to get up off the ground by them… so go figure… it taught me alot.. it made my laugh alot.. sorry I actually laughted alot at those numb nuts.. however, so did they at me… great mates as kids btw.. not a day went by that my knees, nor my head didn’t have a few black and blue marks.. but, I would never look at them as anything but, me being a bratt saving my brothers sorry sooky ass.. However, I will say one thing my brother saw me do it and what do you think with time he did?
Yup, well, he had this shitty habbit and I had to never discount his brave nature he would find the biggest bully and say, this, oh god, “I am not scared of you, just because you can fight doesnt mean I wont be able to beat you, then he would laugh, hmm,” some how not so funny, really, and not that easy to get him away from “those bullies”, however, somehow I was always there.. god damn it… many, many, many, many, did I say many? Times…god shit poo… lol
We are not perfect however, us women should start being more feminine there seem to be too many females acting like males on behalf of our men that we spend our lives with.
I am one of them I said to my husband the other night if anyone hurts you emotionally, that is my main objection when it comes to him that they will be mine to take on because of that isn’t okay!
Blaming and shaming, one another especially our males isn’t cool, they require us to love them, support them, tell them that they are valued, which is something I have noticed that I do not do enough for my own husband.
That also will change!
When your a single mother or a girl that really only had herself to deal with the world it is difficult to step back and say nothing I so get that!
Very difficult for us to say nothing because frankly we are female and we end up saying too much it is hard for us to learn a new behaviour that will benefit as long as the person your withholds your hand and allows himself to trust you.
Trust is the answer and so is communication with every person on this Earth, without talking to one another how are we going to grow and understand how each other feels about things? We cannot expect everyone to be “us” we have to forgive, we have to listen we have to adapt and perhaps learn a few new understandings, we cannot assume everyone should be mind readers, we are not your parents we did not hurt you, abandon you, we say things to one another that at times isn’t okay!
I know I seem to assume, put my 2 pennies worth of crap in, I tend to think that I know best all because of nothing but my own shit! I get on my high horse and rant, rave, yell, a mindset of blocking others out and listening mostly to negative unrealistic bullshit!
I cut people off and hear a bit of a sentence then interrupt and say, yup say no more I then ramble about me… whoops, bad, not good, and it does not make friends either!!
Try to stop, listen and not judge others because you might be surprised to find out what really is ticking in a place that could potentially hinder, hurt and lame another person by muting their existence!
Change happens within a millisecond of saying nothing, so try and say little by allowing those that know about themselves by listening and allowing a female to be a female and letting a male be mindful of his needs because our men can be hurt too just like us girls.
- Men are so silent it scares me to death to think what the hell is it that ticks them off!
Men are so silent is it possible they have been hurt like us girls?
- Can men be raped like us women? What do you think? Absolutely, and do you hear them cry? Do you hear them say a word to anyone?
Imagine if you allowed your thoughts to go there for a moment that our men can be hurting inside just like us girls.. how would you feel?
So, the Gillette is not a bad video… get grip wingers!!!
I like this video I still think that us women have alot of understanding and we must be aware that we could be better ourselves!!
Gillette commercial that has so many people up in arms.
I couldn’t for the life of me understand what was so wrong about it.
To me, the idea of the commercial was to challenge one another to be better human beings.
To not be a bystander when there are toxic behaviours happening all around you. Frankly, I loved the message
Spoiler alert for how the rest of the conversation went: He did NOT share my view.
His take was this:
- He sees women as a protected class.
- What would happen, he pondered, if the commercial implied that women were toxic?
- His suspicion and I think he might be right here, is that Gillette would be done for. From his perspective, Gillette and the rest of the world are picking on guys like him.
- Good guys that can’t walk around without feeling like they have done something wrong because they have male genitalia.
- He is sick of being portrayed as the bad guy all the time.
- Even in trying to defend himself as one of the good guys, he felt that he came across as defending “toxic” behaviours.
He wasn’t being toxic.
He was just being him.
A man. And there is nothing inherently toxic
I get his point.
The trouble, as I see it, is the assignment of the word “toxic” to any particular gender.
Toxicity is toxicity.
Males certainly don’t have a monopoly on bad behaviours.
Perhaps we need to rethink the assignment of the term “toxic masculinity,” as the definition is too easily expanded to offend people like my friend who feels as if his whole gender is under attack.
Toxicity doesn’t belong to a gender any more than it can be exclusively assigned to skin colour.
In fact, females, are often the drivers of exactly the behaviours we label as being “toxic” in males.
Female mate selection is complicated, but the driving characteristics of “good mates” haven’t changed throughout evolutionary history.
Females today demonstrate the same preferences for their sexual partners as their ancestors did. In short, we want protectors.
In experimental settings, women are generally more attracted to males with higher testosterone, and more aggressive/dominant tendencies.
Hmmm….in reality this means that as females, we may be selected for some of the behaviours we label as “toxic masculinity.”
These “toxic behaviours” might be the direct result of our selections.
And what of the toxic femininity?
What do we do to one another as females?
As I was drinking my coffee this morning, I found myself flipping through one of my “girly” magazines.
I began noticing all the ways it made me feel imperfect.
All the other smiling females that looked back judgingly at me from the interior pages – all skin glowing, and tight stomachs, and perfectly shiny hair and makeup and I began to realize that this was the equivalent of males flexing at one another.
The readership of this magazine is 91% female.
These pages were made for me, to demonstrate how a female should look.
This could easily be labelled as toxic femininity.
Is there anything wrong with being in shape, and pretty and smiling?
Of course not! But could it be toxic in its interpretation by me?
The idea that I had to meet some standard of perfection in order to be feminine is certainly a toxic formula – perhaps the same formula we assign to men (must you demonstrate your testosterone-laden tendencies in order to be masculine?).
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- Do females abuse one another with these standards?
- Do we gossip and put one another down and hurt each other by spreading vicious rumours?
Do we weaponize sex, and use it as a powerful tool to get what we want?
More than most of us will care to admit.
These behaviours aren’t exclusively feminine any more than bullying, catcalling, and abuse of power is exclusively masculine.
I’m not justifying behaviours on either side.
In fact, I’m condemning them on both sides.
There are toxic behaviours in the world. And certainly, some are demonstrated by one gender at disproportionately higher rates than the other, but it is the behaviour itself, not the gender that needs the label.
- Yes, sexual harassment is toxic.
- Yes, bullying is toxic.
- Yes, intentionally hurting another human without cause is toxic.
But perhaps we need to put the labels in the right place.
On the behaviours.
We will need males and females as equal advocates in a fight to make the world a better, less toxic world for everyone.