Tag Archive for ‘truth’

The Top 10 Questions on Sex and Psychology


For today’s post, I have put together an updated list of the ten most read Q&As of all time on the blog. As you’ll see, these questions (all submitted by readers of Sex and Psychology) span quite a range of topics.

However, most of them are united by the same theme:

  • “What’s normal when it comes to sex?
  • What you’ll see when you read the answers is that “normal” does not mean just one thing!

10. How often do married couples have sex?

9. Do women become “loose” if they have a lot of sex?

  •  (Some women’s vaginas may become “looser” over time, but not as a function of how much sex they’re having.)

8. What percentage of women reach orgasm from intercourse alone?

  •  (Based on the research I’ve seen, about half of the women surveyed report this.)

7.  Is deeper penetration better?

  • (For most women, not necessarily—but for some it is. In fact, some women can reach orgasm from stimulation of the cervix.) 

6. Does penis size actually affect female pleasure?

  •  (The answer to the deeper penetration question above addresses the issue of penile length. But what about girth/circumference? Research finds that women tend to rate girth as the most important penis dimension. For a more detailed look at the research on this subject, see here.)

5. Do women enjoy anal sex?

  • (Many do, and studies find that it is an increasingly common sexual activity practised by women today. Although it didn’t make the top 10 list this time around, many readers have also been curious about how to make anal sex more pleasurable.)

4. Injaculation: Is it dangerous for guys to prevent ejaculation during orgasm?

  • (Probably not. There isn’t a single scientific source to suggest that this practice causes problems. In fact, this is actually a common and very successful technique used among guys who are trying to learn better ejaculatory control in order to resolve premature ejaculation.)

3. Is “rimming” safe?

  • (Like any sexual activity, there are risks associated with this one–but there are also ways to make it safer.) Make sure you check if the girl or boy has taken Xenical then your in for a surprise…lol

2. Why are so many straight men into transsexual porn?

  • (This is a common sexual interest among men and, contrary to popular belief, most men who are attracted to male-to-female transsexuals are not gay.)

1. I want to watch my wife sleep with someone else. Is that normal?

  • (Believe it or not, this is also a very common sexual fantasy among men. For an even more detailed look at the research in this area, check out this article.)

Bambi-Magazine-fashion-beauty-photography_52e01d5d9567f-560x372

 

To do something that you have never done before…


Imagine your on a journey however, remove all the labels, marriage, comfortably.. what have you got?

This all depends on how many is on this journey….? right..

This also depends on the ability to remove your own self and be able to naturally normal however, who wants to be normal or should I say “I am certainly not normal”.

I am a natural pain in the A$$

You see this is how I look at life.. you’re doing something that you think you are in control…but, really how are you in control ?

How long does this last for?

Are you invested?

Or are you that kind of person that only puts in what they think that they can handle?

How do you measure that emotion?



Cracks to me are… many things.. cocky behaviour, brothers in arms hand in  hand (suddenly I have this image of two men in tights skipping down the yellow brick pavement of loopy ness) snap out of it…… or is it a solo one way ticket to Mars…. because frankly, mine has been likes this from the very beginning … which you could say was a while ago…

When a person is so relaxed doesn’t think about their needs they could be disconnected and very busy so they don’t think……

Or they get run down and sick which isn’t the result however, could be..

Just an interesting thought… how much would you gauge in a journey with yourself, others?

What is your thoughts of how you would manage your journey..?

So, how much does a person invest into a possible risk…. I am using this word….. for many reasons….

My answer to this is EVERYTHING….. I go in from the very beginning str8 into the deep end…. and the funny thing is .. I seem to be still keeping my head just above the water…..figure of speech…… keeping that I am a women…

What if you are a man .. ?

Zombie time warp…. have a watch…. seems fitting..

IF you can paint me a picture of this journey, then what good are you? or Perhaps, it is as simple or as they say difficult as you want it to be, right?

This is now the time to be present and begin this Journey today..


Lets talk about being Present within yourself and within those that you share you lives with socially and explisitly, without judgement, bullshit, just enjoy and have so bloody fun..

Cheesy-friendship-quotes

They blame you instead and think it is funny….

We do deserve to be ourselves… we are not caged animals..are we??

Your journey, my journey, the popes journey we all have them and those that understand what that means in fact understand we all have limitations in our lives, however, this isnt about limitations…. I am talking about no LIMITATIONS.. going forward….

In fact let’s be real for a moment

We get to a point in our lives that we go on our personal journeys some include people that are the same mind set.. you would hope… some prefer to go naked and find new ones… some love that same simular smart mouthed larikin… I am one of those.. so is my hubby however, we also love to socialise with new exciting people who love life..

So, let’s shift and start doing because we should now be ready to walk side by side and enjoy life, right?life-quotes-inspiration-i-just-want-friendship-we-have-something-so-special-and-both-be-through-so-muc

I am ready, I know my hubby is… are you?

I had the best weekend and the efforts of my own self was firstly the most powerful, gob smacking, speechless, and devine moment I have had thus far…

In fact, I wanted to just stop and breath in this amazing awareness that I experienced I felt safe, I had no noise, I thought for one moment that my age was back as a young women where I seemed to really let go of things easier… or at least quicker..

However, this feeling was much better… Let me tell you

So, what is it going to take to be present and take that leap of faith?deep-connection-friendships

So, for me, my gorgeous, husband and hopefully anyone else that wishes to put up with our bad inappropriate behaviour, opinionated beliefs, excellent humour, and frankly we are pretty friggin annoying… couple but, yes any other that wishes to jump on board our pink jumbo elephant then by all means.. do so…

So from today which indeed I believe that we are all ready.. to have so bloody fun or at least get dressed up go out into this perth city and find a bar, view, beach, bottle of wine and have some really good fun.

Laughing, is the best start to any journey with those that you care enough about, get along with and have no limitations to expressing whatever you wish to say, feel, joke about with life can and will always be as hard and difficult as you wish… nothing is garenteed and that is what our entire life has been based on…

Below is all those emotions that we tend to have within us… have a look.. and embrace, and trust yourself… nothing to be lost… everything to be loved..

………………so what are you waiting for?? I am so excited to walk with a better skip rather than hesitation anymore.. done and dusted… let’s go and have some bloody fun… okay ?

BTW… nice choice of music xxx

What if you don’t even know… hmm?


The going consensus is that women in the lifestyle are either bi-curious or bisexual…

What if women don’t know if they are anything other than what they know?

Seriously, unless you are married to a person who questions I dunno, pretty much everthing that god has said not too… (shucks) If it was up to me remove the damn labels and find out for ourselves… this is also for men as well.. go figure how hard is life .. seriously people… moving on….images

Even though that may be very true for many, others still don’t wish for things to be labeled as there are only bi-sexual ladies in the lifestyle. After all, the lifestyle thankfully allows for variety in every single way imaginable!

Girls, Girls, Girls

A little research on this topic at travel events reveals that there are also those who can just appreciate a beautiful woman while still being very straight.

Then there are those who like to just kiss another woman without it going into a full-on sex session too. Of course, that could be somewhat of a stretch as at events, limits and boundaries are somewhat flexible.

Why is that?

Well, because apparently, and this comes from the mouth of the ladies themselves:

  • Women do kiss differently than men!
  • Really?
  • Yes, I am not that way atm… however, I have experienced women’s kisses… shock!! I have??? Nooooooo me who is straight god hell.. what is life going to do to me now???
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If I turned around so many things would have been different, would it? Probably, maybe, who would know, maybe better than you think!

 

Many ladies experimented in their younger years with their girlfriends. Word of mouth only goes so far after all!

They do???

No???

LOL, jesus, seriously?

So, What Gives?

When asked, it was mentioned that there is a significant difference in experience when kissing a woman instead of a man.

Kissing a woman is described as:

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  • just a bit lovelier, quite softer and deeper with a beautiful layer of delicacy. So now that we know that, do those kissing women then want to get “kissed” to change into a bisexual lady perhaps?

The answer, give or take a few: Oh no, not at all, of course the more the merrier, but it’s also awesome to be able to just kiss a beautiful woman without it having to go any further than that. No other expectations, period.

But do Women Prefer Women over Men?

The next logical question is: Do women prefer a woman’s kiss over the kiss of a man? And the answer again is no, it’s just considered different and more of a nice addition. Well, all in all, the men don’t seem to mind… On the contrary, a look, a flirt, a kiss, a touch and who knows where things will lead.

That very first kiss between women, what makes it so special? At SDC travel events you can witness this magic happen all the time. Threesomes and foursomes and moresomes are not an uncommon result either. Absolutely nothing is wrong with that, so by all means, if and when the urge hits you, kiss away ladies!

Each to their own I believe, baby steps, don’t beat yourselves up, and never, ever think life is as difficult as most would seem to think!

We are only human beings living in a world that seems to have everything bit like a candystore.. right so, please don’t make it harder than it should be by making it more difficult for each other.

Love and Trust, never say things like…. I don’t care if, or I am not bothered, or Never say to your wife… he or she is off limits because the question is why?

If you just relax a bit let them think … let them go .. if your not open to everything then stay home and watch a movie because if your not open.. then the door stays shut..

It is as simple or difficult as you make it.. if you start dictating to each other what you think it should be.. it does become quite difficult to understand each other and the next thing you both do is disconnect!9bcf8fe9f858a35a5bc9bbde2b4e3ddb

So, please pace yourselves…. relax….. and take your time…. be mindful of each others minds and hearts…. always allow one another to think for themselves and never tell each other that what they think and feel is wrong..

Let them work it out… for themselves 🙂

Candii xxx

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Time for a little Change…


Hello lovelies,

BLOGGERS WHY DON’T YOU TALK ON HERE?

As you are aware I chat on here about reflection, experiences of others and a little of myself and my past as we all do.

So, I wanted to do something different moving forward now this will be based on my Studies in the next few years for Counselling which is still pending for completion in August and of course sexologist next year.915e1ee238ac17f4e8cb103699b30392

Now, what is it that I would love you to share with me?

Well, this is completely up to you I know for some it seems difficult to open up and talk in normal circumstances however, this is a blog and blogs are used for chatting about themselves or perhaps experiences or even the main topic that the writer provides you with.

So, what topics interest you in being part of?

  • Lets look at what you would like to see more on a blog or at least what topic would interest you and make you chat about?
  • Do you like talking about issues or thoughts about sex?
  • Have you got a question that is in the back of your mind and you would like me to do some research on it for you?
  • Do you have anything that you would like to discuss with others that your stuck with?
  • Is there anything in your life that you would like me to help solve for you?
  • If you are an expert in a field what is it that you do?

Why am I asking the above?

Well, because I do have a huge heart, and I believe in sharing my thoughts this is why I share so much and hide so much so I don’t feel alone myself.  And at times more than I would like I do feel very isolated and very much alone and if you knew me, that is like caging a wild alley cat that wouldn’t be kind at all 🙂

39352800_287197282071199_6664480631281418240_n.jpgThe questions are just random however, I would love to see if we can get others that have perhaps questions, ideas, expert in fields that can help others?  I find it very important to talk about subjects of either the heart, soul, how to help one another in need or even just say your bit because that is what our mouths are for. to share ideas and help one another for all of us to grow.

Life is what you make of it.. if you don’t say your bit how are those that cannot open their mouths going to know that they are not alone in this world!giphy

We need people who help one another we do not need ostriches that put their head in the sand and say nothing…

How would that help anyone? lets face it, right!

So, if you can please add something or at least answer a few of those questions above and lets see if we can at least help 1 person.images (50)

Love and hugs Franny x

So, can you help me, help you?

 

Come on Board the Merry-go-round


Your Stress or your insecurity and your jealousy is nothing without your approval so how valuable is it to you to destroy those you adore so lovingly without judgement nor selfish need..

 

 

I know I would adore that emotional harsh and so easy emotional gift because it is free and willing to just take from the Universe by respecting it and valueing it deeply..

How?

 

GIve yourself a break and embrace this life by openess… easy change it now.. 

That will make you grow, love, understand have amazing experiences without any negative thought, how about that bitch subconscious mind that keeps reminding us of what society has done a bloody grand job of helping us with trauma, cheating partners, betrayal of the family kind, a moment of explain over and over again./

 

I am not that person based on a simpletons group of individuals, that cannot manager as a single unit without bickering and bastard shame all because of a Rich boy who had no honour as a friend.images (40)

Disgraceful, dishonest and darn right shameful underlining back stabbing and narcissistic behaviour according to a Boy who could not find a place that may have possibly saved a mates skin..

You know slanderous lies are the most vicious, nasty, and hateful emotions men can use at other men, all because of fuck knows, seriously popularity?

You see how vicious us humans are we use, abuse those that understand emotional trauma or perhaps you have your own safety net cuz like-minded can be ridiculed and treated with disrespect because …. Once upon a time.. a very long time ago that person you want to offload had her life, or his life ripped out from under him and was made out to be a liar.. based on bullshit nothing.. based on what they think.. but, never based on fact… what a load of shit…

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Their entire life they or you think they know no better or are used to be treated badly and that is why you can justify a nasty, narcissistic, abuse, and don’t forget you fellow brothers that bond so well just like sisterhood does, would throw you under the bus so quickly all because of popularity for a moment of a huge Ego that need to be brushed regularly and for what reason would you sell out a friend, partner, like-minded soul all because of your own Selfish needs and how long does that feeling last for?

Interesting, so let’s say when you do this and unbeknownst to you they are the lowest that they have ever been and you go out come home and your wife, child, husband or perhaps that fall guy that you shot in the head so nicely by not believing his spoken word satisfied you all for a moment?

Was it longer, how exciting? like perhaps 1/2 a day, wow, that will teach them… so let’s go further with satisfying your negative babble, a day passes and you get up notice no ones around and head off the garage and because your ego was more important that a human beings life, honor, back or even sisterhood, the decided to take their life by hanging themselves all because of your Mental negative thought process, fuelled by something that you still have to deal with in your own past...

Well, that is the worst, cruelest feeling all because of EGO or god only knows… that make you a a hero for what? 

Nothing funny about suicide (this is the worst case scenario) all because of cruelty, people who cared more about themselves made a male feel less than and could possibly lame his trust ability, his life and his living a life with no fears.. But, no without probably cause, nor proof they accused a male and could have triggered depression or even worse..

But, as long as that bond of brothers got their needs met somehow by being the hero’s for about 10 minutes, 1/2 a day or even better a whole week… Boys you are legends and take a pathetic bow of your pathetic team effort of nothing.

Bad, disgusting and potentially, the worst behaviour known to man – however, this is just my opinion.. and who am I to say all this well perhaps I noticed a too much and perhaps I understood the vacant ability of some that never seem to disappoint… trust me this is not a positive nor is it an honor to hold as men… moving on..

  • Is this what you want to live for????

  • TO be right?

  • To be intelligent?

  • To off load your past areas of your life all because you said, I have no issues??!!

If you had no issues why on EARTH WOULD YOU ATTACK THOSE THAT LOVE AND CARE ABOUT YOU, without question, without money, position, without anything but your love and kindness, trust, and shoulder so they can build up themselves to be there for you when it is your turn…how-to-propose-a-boy-quotes-elegant-52-fantastic-best-lines-to-propose-a-boy-the-proposal-of-how-to-propose-a-boy-quotes.jpg

Never use triggers that you learn from their trauma just because your life has bumps we all do we are not perfect…. if you wish to live.. be real, be accountable…

However, being mean and cruel to those that have always been treated like that…. that is like kicking a dog when you know it has been kicked and damaged all their life.

Do them a favour and get a gun and shoot them because that is exactly what they will do to their selves…. if people continue to circum to negative, cruel and intentional credit by using bully tactic behaviour I find that just a wasted life..images (43)

 

So here is an example of personalities…

Husband….. his natural nature is kind-hearted, loyal, intelligent, loving, trusting and forgiving, hard working…he does have a logical side to him but, this is a virgo… 

Above this is based on his natural ability… when someone is  accused , made to be the blame for parents who use children as a weapon against the other parent some of those beautiful qualities tarnish they still are the persons beliefs however, it is difficult to find them over time because they have learnt to protect themselves..helenkeller1.jpg

Wifes….. natural nature, kind, crazy, curious nature, loving, nurturing, a little bit nieve, loyal, forgiving, creative, and hard-working… her dream was to have many kids with a loving husband… end of story…. that was her actual requirement to have 4 beautiful kids.. she had 1 and her ex made sure of that fact this terrible horrid person would suffer all because of his ego was hindered because she wanted a divorce…..images (42).jpg

Stories we tell are based on making other feel less than what they are all because of selfishness and lack of understanding and most of all no-one gave them the tools to see a better picture so one day someone or something made them change because their life, their own determination was based on those cores personality and beliefs ..

For that I must ask you.. is it so worth it to lay your own past events that you just have not had the time, or your ego cannot bare the hurt, or you just cant be bothered ??

Which one are you….. old quote.. may the first person who has no sin pick up that rock and throw it at this whore…. all because you find her unworthy according to whom?

quote by Jesus Christ..

Longing for Change…


Beautiful Lyrics… absolutely lovely…. Gaga’s New Movie Debut…

Wow, very amazing I cannot wait to see this Movie…

Wish I could, I could’ve said goodbye
I would’ve said what I wanted to
Maybe even cried for you
If I knew, it would be the last time
I would’ve broke my heart in two
Tryin’ to save a part of you

Don’t wanna feel another touch
Don’t wanna start another fire
Don’t wanna know another kiss
No other name falling off my lips
Don’t wanna to give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won’t even let the sunlight in
No, I’ll never love again
I’ll never love again, ooh

When we first met
I never thought that I would fall
I never thought that I’d find myself
Lying in your arms
And I want to pretend that it’s not true
Oh baby, that you’re gone
‘Cause my world keeps turning, and turning, and turning
And I’m not moving on

Don’t wanna feel another touch
Don’t wanna start another fire
Don’t wanna know another kiss
No other name falling off my lips
Don’t wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won’t even let the sunlight in
No, I’ll never love

I don’t wanna know this feeling
Unless it’s you and me
I don’t wanna waste a moment, ooh
And I don’t wanna give somebody else the better part of me
I would rather wait for you, ooh

Don’t wanna feel another touch
Don’t wanna start another fire
Don’t wanna know another kiss
Baby, I’ll just stay on your lips
Don’t wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won’t even let the sunlight in
Oh, I’ll never love again

Love again
Oh, I’ll never love again
I’ll never love again
I won’t, I won’t, I swear I can’t
I wish I could but i just won’t
I’ll never love again
I’ll never love again, ooh

 

[Verse 1: Bradley Cooper]
Tell me somethin’ girl
Are you happy in this modern world?
Or do you need more
Is there somethin’ else you’re searchin’ for?

[Refrain: Bradley Cooper]
I’m fallin’
In all the good times
I find myself longing for change
And in the bad times I fear myself

[Verse 2: Lady Gaga]
Tell me something boy
Aren’t you tired tryin’ to fill that void?
Or do you need more
Ain’t it hard keepin’ it so hardcore?

[Refrain: Lady Gaga]
I’m falling
In all the good times
I find myself longing for change
And in the bad times I fear myself

[Chorus: Lady Gaga]
I’m off the deep end
Watch as I dive in
I’ll never meet the ground
Crash through the surface
Where they can’t hurt us
We’re far from the shallow now

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Beautiful Quotes….


I have borrowed these from a great Blogger link below to the person who inspired most of these quotes…life-quotes-inspiration-i-just-want-friendship-we-have-something-so-special-and-both-be-through-so-muc

Truth

“Never ruin someone’s life with a lie, when your world can be destroyed with the truth.”

Tell them…

“If you love someone, tell them. Because hearts are broken by the words unspoken.” 

Enjoying sex…

“Enjoying sex doesn’t make you a whore, just like being a virgin doesn’t make you saint.” 

A good man…

“Allow a good man to ruin your lipstick, not your mascara.” 

Sex and Marriage12ba5c1805debdfd1dbfa06d77882a0d.jpg

“God created sex. Priests created marriage.”
– Voltaire

Lay me down…

Lay me down,
get ready to play,
clear your calendar,
to make love all day.

Start with kisses,
touch me low,
caress me tight,
as we take it slow.

Cat fight

 

“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.” – Abraham Lincoln6dd056fa77d441b87e2deffa867f35ef.jpg

Master Your Passions

 

 

 

“The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions.” – Lord Tennyson Alfred

Quality Friendships


A true friend can have many different good qualities, but the qualities that add up to true friendship may be the most important.

 

Loyalty is a quality that everyone looks for in a friend.

loyal friend will stick with you no matter what the situation is and you can always count on them being on your side.

Qualities of a Good Friend:

As you read through these descriptions, envision your friends, and the ones who are truly quality will come to mind every time:

  • Your friend is a good listener. She doesn’t interrupt with her own stories, but encourages you to talk as long as you need. She is genuinely interested in you.

 

  • Your friend gives you space. She understands that you need time for other things in your life, and those things don’t endanger your friendship.

 

  • Your friend is forgiving. Maybe, in a fit of exasperation at something else, you were cruel or rude. Your friend understands.

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  • Your friend is reliable. When your friend says she will do something, she does. You don’t have to worry that she will let you down.

 

  • Your friend supports you through tough times. She shows up at your apartment with a bottle of wine because she knows you’ve had a rough day. She knows how to improve your mood and reduce your stress.

 

  • Your friend is trustworthy. You can tell your friend anything and know that she will keep it to herself.

 

  • Your friend helps you to reach your goals. Need an exercise buddy? She’s there. Need an emergency babysitter so you can attend class? She’s there.

Are You a Good Friend?

Friendship is a give and take.

It’s just as important to be a good friend as it is to have good friends, and it takes time and an openness of self to nurture a quality friendship. You know what qualities you value in your close friends; why not measure your own behavior to see if you could be a better friend? To be the best friend you can be:

  • Accept yourself as you are. Be realistic and secure about who you are. Insecurity and self-criticism push friends away.

 

  • Accept others as they are. Don’t judge. When your friends make mistakes, give them a shoulder to cry on, but only give them advice if they ask for it. Don’t belittle them or their choices.

When friends get together, it can be a positive and healing experience. Find the time to connect with your friends often. It’s much more important than a household chore or the latest episode of your favorite TV show. Call a friend for coffee or lunch, or just take a long walk and talk about anything and everything. It may just be the best thing you’ve done for yourself, and your friend, in a long time.download (5)

What is the best thing a friend has ever done for you? 

I am me… if you do not like me.. then see that door…


What can I say about this title many things….. Let me tell you….

Thus far, far out and how amazing is life!!!

We often forget who we are, how we got here, what moments was it that made us “Stop and Smell those bloody Thorns”.

Why the thorns, good question, why the hell not..

Nothing in life is easy or smooth let’s face it and if you say it is then we must be lying right!

So, in saying that I decided to say what I said, because I did!

Life is what it is.. It is what you want to make of it.. I cannot say to you the answer as I am still finding it myself..

And there is nothing wrong with that..

However, if you wish me to answer it.. it is made up on mistakes, winnings, many happy times, many sad times, disappointment, happy ever after times, its made of children that will put a smile on your face, loving moments that we all cherish, it is made of sadness when someone breaks your heart for the first time and it is made of many shades of blue, green, pink, yellow, red, orange, and I could go on.

  • It is also made of regrets of not being there for those that I should have been… with that I am soulful sorry (my son)580616_10151758483017361_261523703_n

What do I love the most 

I love myself (shit that was hard to say)  it has taken a very long time for me to say those words, I love my partner who has been by my side so many years, it is made up of dear friends I say it with the (s) why because it is more than 1 which is more than most have..

 

I love these people because they love me and that is enough no more than how that is because I am lucky..

Why do I want this?

Because I do…

What is it that you regret?

Many, Many things in my life… which is mine and if you wish to find out what, then you walk in my shoes and then ask me the same bloody question!

We can have a crystal ball tell each other I know better than you.. however, what is so significant about your life that you are better and more knowledgable what if you’re not?

Seriously speaking come on !!!

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And my dear bloggers it is that easy… if life was easy and we didn’t hurt, cry, if we had no error if everything in this life was that easy would you say… I know better?

Far out, even god would not say such things….

My suggestion is this….

Smile, love, and listen don’t be foolish if you have any business telling others who you think they are and how you think they should live , well good luck with that!

I would hate to be you if you did say such things to another!

Who wants perfect, anyway!

Not me!!!!

This is who I am:

  • I am 50 years old
  • I am in a loving and giving  relationship of 21 years
  • I make mistakes
  • I do very well at times
  • I am a very loud and opinionated female
  • I am a survivor
  • I am a mother
  • I also have good, bad, and darn right not the best at times with the above
  • I am human
  • I am true to myself and my partner, friends and family
  • I make mistakes just like everyone else and I am happy with that…
  • I love my 1 or 2 friends that I have on this earth
  • I am incredibly stubborn
  • I love with every bit of my being
  • If I say something real to you, you better believe it that I am telling you the truth
  • If I tell you my story, your lucky
  • I am a proud female who adores people for who they are not what they can give me back
  • I have no expectations of anything
  • But, I do love, and I do it with every part of my body, soul and faith

So, the question answered is Submission is about pleasing ourselves and those that are worthy of my being this isn’t a given this is earn and I am blessed with who wants to be my friend…

So, Who are you?

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Memories of yesterday… something funny


Have you ever gone to a Sunday session and you look around and scope that pub with your girl friends what do you notice?

My visual even when I was young could see so many different groups of mates, friends, surfies hanging around a pool table drinking beer then I would veer my eyes over to the bar and then notice those gangs that hung around each other they walked the same, they even had similar close then their mates and girl friends.

Then of course the locals divided into two groups by colours on their backs normally these wonderful long-haired scruffy unwashed and smelly bike lovers would look like they had not washed, cut their hair and always hung around the corner bar and dart board area.. that was their area…

Then of course the seriously good-looking angry-looking, in fact they had no expression on their gorgeous mannish faces these boys where my favourites.. at the time cuz normally when they smiled OMG moment pearly white teeth AND  COULD THEY smile took my breath away…

All these different designer men at a Beach hotel in Waikiki, packed pub, and a live band was never ever a disappointment, cuz us girls pint-sized nothing surfie, girls normally tanned black, with surfie beads, stone washed jeans tightly around our asses and all of us cute as buttons.. with our crisps white shirts and butter would not melt in our little 18-year-old mouths… oh yes, indeed…

And me who always and every Sunday Session would do the same walk to find those broody boys who had no smiles…. so what do you think I did to crack those smashing smiles….

Cheeky, sassy, brassy, short asses swinging from the tall bar swinging off with my feet not even close to the floor in their faces.. with my pearly whites saying, come on I know you can give me those beautiful pearls….

Oh, boy, oh, Boy….

Not every time I would but, always there would be at least two cuz they definitely would not broad at the bar alone.. too cool for school and leant over the bar … O M G, legs of steel and an ass of metal… impressive in tight bloody jeans.. my mouth open wide thinking wow I found them mind-blowing and a definite cracker……

Never date them but, jesus I used to get a beautiful smile out of these gorgeous men… and did they smile…. and sass with me… listen you naughty minx you should be home in bed cuz it was past my bed time…. how rude… however, I couldn’t get my smile off my face as I walked passed them and always I was picked up swung around and paid back let me tell you…

I think they put me in a rather tall empty hollow statue once…at least tried too upside down..the only problem is I recalled them saying as they laughed shit… she fitted… bloody hell…… It was at the other local which was unexpected cuz I didn’t see them…. but, they spotted me  and it was pay back…….bastards……..Screamed my heaD OFF…

In surprise… so damn funny…. so damn hot!!!

However, I was surrounded by rather well, good healthy vibrant, strong and let me say broody men which I knew I could only do this too them a couple of times before they got sick of me… these guys where too old but, far out they had white, white teeth… and it was worth it…just to see them smiling..

True story… Franny x

It’s Not What You Know, It’s How You Think


How we think affects everything from our ability to solve problems to how we understand meaning, value, and purpose.

There are many trends and patterns to be found in the past, and the Durants do a commendable job of highlighting them. The essence of their view, however, can be summarized by the following sentence from their short book:

The only real revolution is in the enlightenment of the mind and the improvement of character, the only real emancipation is individual, and the only real revolutionists are philosophers and saints.

The Durants believed that despite all that has and continues to change in our external environment, the real battle is still internal. Real change doesn’t happen until we face our minds and our thoughts.

There is a fair degree of nuance that needs to be accounted for with a statement like that, and it ties into larger questions of what progress is and how subjects relate to objects, but the fact that our thoughts — and their ability to change our minds — play a pivotal role in our experience of reality is self-evident in ways that are common sense. How we think affects everything from our ability to solve problems to how we understand meaning, value, and purpose. The Durants made it their life’s work to improve this ability in the average person by disseminating information — mostly history and philosophy.

But information alone doesn’t make our thinking better. We also have to understand and update the way our minds process this information.

Our Minds Get Stuck in Habit Loops – if you wish Mindsets

Based on popular psychology literature, some thinkers have codified the way we form habits into a simple loop: a trigger, a routine, and a reward. We see something in our environment that sets off the trigger; the trigger leads to a routine we’ve internalized based on our past interactions in such an environment; finally, a reward at the end reinforces said routine.

If you observe this in your daily life, you’ll see that it’s roughly right. Our brain is a pattern-seeking survival machine, and habits are how it ensures that we don’t have to think too hard about what to do when familiar situations arise, letting us conserve energy.

With time, we start to recognize patterns around us, and we internalize these patterns so that we can reuse them in the future.

When it comes to the human mind, there are still no concrete theories of how thought emerges. We know, however, that thought plays a pivotal role in facilitating how we interact with the information that the Durants, for example, were trying to impart on us.

In the same way that we form habits of action relating to our environment, we also form habits of thought when it comes to how we think about the world. We are all born into a reality in which — at first, at least — we can’t even distinguish between our own separateness from the world. With time, however, we start to recognize patterns around us, and we internalize these patterns — like we do habits — so that we can reuse them in the future. Usually, if a pattern persists in our mental habits, it means that it is valuable in some sense. But this is only the case if we apply that pattern to the right information.

One of the reasons it’s so hard to change our minds about things is that our brains are stuck in these mental habit loops, which tend to look at information from a singular point of view. Our brains have learned something in one context, so they mistakenly apply it to others, mixing up the triggers that lead to routine thoughts.

We’re all capable of overpowering these habit loops, of course, but it’s very easy and productive to have them operating as the default mode. To think well, we must be aware of their limitations and to not let them restrict us.

Diversifying Thinking Patterns Changes Us

Each of us faces different challenges at different times in different ways based both on our biology and our unique cultural upbringing. No two people think exactly the same way because no two people have lived exactly the same life.

In fact, these different thinking patterns (mostly produced from our mental habit loops) are, in large part, what makes you, you and me, me. Our identities are borne from the convergence of these patterns. They create our subjective experience.

The more diverse our trained thinking patterns are, the more accurately we will be able to interact with information around us.

The Durants are getting at the idea that although we’ve seen so much external change throughout history, none of it truly makes a difference unless we calibrate our internal, subjective experience with that objective, external environment. Our subjective experience is limited, and using it — and the thinking patterns that create it — as a baseline for understanding the world is a limited way to go through life. It biases us in the wrong direction.

At its core, a thinking pattern is an implicit rule of thumb for the way we connect aspects of our reality. Given the complexity of this reality, the more diverse our trained thinking patterns are — and the better refined the associated triggers are — the more accurately we will be able to interact with information around us.

Because thinking patterns emerge from the mental habit loops we form as a response to experience, the only way to diversify them is to seek out new and conflicting encounters. We can do this through books, unfamiliar environments, or even hypothetical thought games.

Outside of extreme external circumstances, any time we’re struggling to solve a problem or lacking a sense of satisfaction and meaning, it’s due to the fact that our current thinking patterns are not adequately suited for the job. Instead, we have to remodel the form and shape of these patterns so they better fit the form and shape of the issue at hand.

How We Think Is What Matters

We’re born with a set of biological machinery, but we’re not born knowing how to use it.

In fact we only know what we only know until we learn something that teaches us something that we didnt realise and this is called a new thought or learnings..

As time goes on, however, we begin to make sense of our reality. We realize what kinds of food are good for us, we learn to avoid things that are painful, and we begin to get attached to those who can take care of us. With even more time, we develop fully concrete distinctions between the different objects around us and how we, as subjects, are to interact with them.

What keeps this process going is our pattern-seeking brain. It forms both habits of action and habits of thought that it embeds into our conscious and subconscious memories to reduce cognitive load.

One of the problems with this, however, is that it’s really easy for us to become stuck in mental habit loops that don’t accurately assess the situation at hand, leading to both problems of comprehension and satisfaction. To counteract this, we have to be intentional in diversifying our thinking patterns. We have to learn to recognize when we’re falling into a mismatched pattern of thought, and we have to then use that information to update how we make connections between the objects in our environment.

To say that all issues can be solved with a shift in thinking patterns ignores the larger picture, but there is a truth to what the Durants learned from history — how we think about what is happening around us is arguably more important than what is actually happening around us.

Remember, we can process what we think and once we experience something or do something or even have those moments that opens up our mind and makes us go.. oh shit, I think it relates to this experience.. then my lovelies the mind becomes clearer and your understanding is taught something new and it retains it for your next chapter.

This is all about growing and learning and changing your brain until it is re-wired to relate and understand other new patterns and hopefully more positive wiring and that will open up moments of bliss.

Good luck and Enjoy it.. because change is something we all do everyday and sometimes we do it when we dont realise that we are doing just that changing for a better more understanding future.

Repeat and Repeat and remember to pat yourself on the back…. because that is amazing…

Franny

Emotional Journey … if I can do it.. so can you?


I wonder often if we ever really live our lives fully?

I often think if we did what we should do or feel would it be easier?

I think the main problem with us as people we tend to over think or perhaps overreact with our emotions and we end up doing the opposite end of what we should be doing with ourselves.

We should act on what we do and be more present with those that we care about however, sometimes feeling something and doing it is just what we should be doing.

I know I am sounding like this “Delhi lambi”, spelt wrong I know, that is exactly what we are acting like fools and doing things opposite end of what we desire to do..  🙂

For example:

Our emotions and our true selves are one are we that scared of rejection that we don’t do what we should do?  Or are we just inept of love, desire, lust, excitement, endorsement, a soul lost in a bowl of Heinz soup with many ABCD and even E’s from our alphabet soup that we loved to eat as kidz!

Strange isnt it!
Or really is it?

I cannot live like being unemotional and so strict in being numb with my emotions, I am an emotional female that loves, the idea of loving and I wont change for the world!

If I had to be real it would be who I am and much, much more and those that I would love to join would be those that want to be part of something more, and to me that would be awesome!

However, we cannot move mountains and mountains cannot be built-in a day or a week or even a few years… if it was up to me it would be but, I am not someone who can make people move quicker, faster, I can only be me and if that is all I am to anyone then I guess my life is going to be a bit solo and a little bit lonely.hqdefault

To love is to be present within your soul and to be open to possibilities of hopefulness and openness who know what tomorrow brings.

What is your thoughts?

Do you think we are that fragile that we cannot open up and say it, do it, feel it, or even live it?

I want to live who wants to join me?

I want to be love who wants to join me?

I want to experience live with people who care about each other does that sound so bad?

What is it that we seem to be missing on this journey?

When will you open up and show me your heart?

 

Question time! Will the truth set you FREE???


  1. Why do we appease people?
  2. Why is it that we only say what others want us to say to one another?
  3. Why can’t we speak our minds and say “to the hell of it”?
  4. Is it so bad to make a comment on ones potential bull shit profiles?
  5. Or is it bad in general to say something that potentially could hurt another?
  6. I don’t think we do this on purpose (however, when it comes to me perhaps after years of bullshit I do have a rope that tends to be too long or too short for some)
  7. So, what is it that people seem to get so offended by comments that are either close to the truth or is the truth??

Rant: the height of rudeness

Here I am all 5 foot of nothingness and I seem to have a savage tongue that I do love to stick out from time to time…

Yes, to those that know me, hate me or even god helps us, loves me.. which I have to say isn’t many!!

I am rude, crude, revolting, hideously horrendous, I have a loud voice when used for good not evil… and I do love to banter with the biggest man or female that will challenge me…. yes, I know this is true…. some of you maybe shocked… yes…

But, it is true……..

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However, it is kinder to be kinder than to be a Monster that no one wants closer than a mountain… so, potentially, when chatting, speaking and even heaven knows when saying something that could hurt another.. try NOT too…..

Because, an animal will always be an animal…. and we are not animals.. are we..?????download (4)

Why do I Blog …What is the reason?


Well, to be honest I do blogs to get to understand those that are on here and this is for many reasons I have a very interesting past and I believe everything happens for a reason.

We tend to take our lives for granted and we never believe our lives are worth much which is sad because I myself have thought that many times in my own life.

I am not on here to be perfect nor am I on here to preach anything that isn’t the truth however, we do tend to have a bit of fun and poke fun at myself mostly or how I actually feel.

But, to be perfectly honest I do this to understand myself express how I feel about my eccentric life which really isn’t however, I have had life that most people would not be aware of and because I so want to complete my studying this may take me sometime as it can be difficult even for me to do.

It means I have to be present, honest, true to myself, those who read some of my piffle but, when I do write about my past sometimes it is easy and sometimes I will write it and I will delete it mainly because it scares the shit out of me for many reasons.

I don’t believe in wanting to dwell on my past but, what I do believe is our paths in our lives is very important and I so want to help those that have similar understandings and most of all help those that I know I can understand those that have walked a simular path as I have.

You see if it wasnt for some wonderful persons that need I say have helped me open my eyes to a lot of things which I thank them even though they may not think I have … So, thank you and I do love you all very much there may not be many that do know about my path but, I do wish for them to know that I do love them and I hold them very close to my heart and soul.. So, to my closest, dearest, imaginary, invisibly, visible and gorgeous souls always know that without those that held my hand and hugged my soul when I wept I thank you so very much with all of my heart and soul…

So, this is why I do this and want to help those that have been hurt through loosing a child through either divorce or wrongly accused for disgraceful ruling due to unfairly being accused or losing their child to suicide, death, tragic and even to those moms that had to let go of children due to rape, drugs, being hurt my others that should never occurred, have nearly hurt themselves due to their own despair and many other reasons that I wish to hold on further for my own growth and understanding.

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So, this is a little to why I want to be here and do what I do because I truly care for others that have been treated unfairly, truly hurtful and devastating occurrences that only those will understand inside themselves…

It is never easy nor is it something that anyone can do.. but, for me I have to do this because I want too and it is inside my own soul, self and most of all my heart cannot .. Not do it.. if that makes any sense..

So, yes, that is why I get on here rant and rave, do funny things and some really odd things it is never difficult it is frustrating because it can be hard to understand myself..

We all learn differently none of us are stupid nor are we psycho nor do we do this because someone else wants us too.. I do it because that is what I want to do… so as I grow and understand myself more I will share with you more as I grow..

Thank you, Franny xxx

When is it okay to forgive someone for “cheating’?


A cheating partner, a personal story of how we look at things in life!

What we as the partner would say that will allow us to say it’s okay?

Is it okay to cheat?

Have you ever been cheated on?

Why?

No?

Yes?

Maybe?

Perhaps it’s more about the why’s?

The justifcation of a partner that prefers to do it alone because they feel it’s “all too hard”, or is it because they require an outlet to be themselves?

Interesting and sad at the same time all because they feel it’s “them with the problem”, not you that cheats?

 

In your opinion, do you think we should forgive those that know no different?

Is it because they cannot be faithful?

Do they get bored?

What is your thoughts on partners that cheat?

When would you say it’s okay sweetheat I forgive you?

 

What would it take for you to forgive someone for cheating?

 

 

Question Time People… if I get enough people to answer.. I was thinking about doing this with Prizes…. but, let’s see if others Answer any of my questions….


So ladies, I have a few questions for you if you have the time to answer 🙂

I wanted to find out what others thing of our preferred preferances in our life and todays society as we call it…What is missing in todays social stream, or perhaps friendships or how about this.. what does it take for you to call a friend a friend?

Us girls seem to love having friendships with either other girls or some girls prefer friendships with men, am I right?

  •  Which do you prefer to have a chin wag with Men or Ladies mates?
  • Why do you prefer it?
  • And what is it that you like about your choice of chatter?

 

Let’s chat ladies and if men wish to answer that would be nice…… let’s see if we get a few to answer some simple however, could be an interesting banter. I would prefter you to be brutally honest…..

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